12 Weeks In The Valley

Long time no musing. When I read back my last post, it’s hilarious and illuminating to me. I’m not blowing my own trumpet…here me out. I wrote that post about 14 days before I realised I was pregnant again. That feeling of ‘fatigue in all my bones and muscles’ was partially due to just doing life, but probably also partially because I was also at the early stages of HOUSING A LIFE.

From the point I found out I was knocked up at the end of April through to the middle of July, I became a permanent resident of a place I like to call The Valley. The Valley is a place I’ve been to once before – when I was pregnant with our first daughter. It involves eating the bare minimum for about 12 weeks (till my 16th week of pregnancy), while barfing twice a day. It also involves having no energy whilst dragging yourself to work and pretending everything is OK. This time round my stay in The Valley was made even more challenging by the fact that my toddler couldn’t care less about my new condition.

It was rough.

Shout out to all those women who are sick during pregnancy. It’s one of those few things in life you can’t just outsource to someone and pay them to take care of it. Hate cleaning, treat yourself – pay someone. Don’t want to cook, treat yourself – order some food. Morning sickness, suck it up, there’s no way out. Thank God I made it.

Once I checked out of The Valley I had to practice getting my life back.  I had to wean our daughter off her tablet I also started working out again. It took me a few more months before I could work my day job at my full physical potential. Needless to say I could turn my attention back to Mummy’s Muse in mid-August. It feels good to be back.

The experience of pregnancy sickness while working on Mummy’s Muse  made me think a lot about the role of unforeseen circumstances on this journey. I often asked my husband (who owns his own business), what would I have done if I was fully up and running and this happened? He said I would have found a way. I find it hard to believe, but we tend to find a way when there are no other options. A little creativity and preparation can go a long way in being ready for life’s curveballs.

My greatest moment of pride and self pity while I was in The Valley came on a random Tuesday afternoon en route home from work. I had to throw up…at Oxford Circus Station…on the tube platform. Too far inside to run out and definitely not going to survive the tube journey home. Your girl pulled out a sick bag she’d bought for the day this might happen, barfed gracefully into the bag, wiped her mouth (wipe was supplied with the sick bags), threw that mess in the bin, held my head high and got on the tube.

Moments of triumph definitely can exist when we’re in the depths of our personal valleys.